HUMP DAY GRAMMAR for July 27, 2011

Just in case you ever questioned the usefulness of hyphens, here's a good example of why we need to use 'em sometimes.  A penis-cutting wife is much different than a penis cutting wife.  Granted, a penis that can cut wives seems like a very talented penis indeed, but it is not the kind of penis I'd ever like to meet.

I'd write more, but I think I'm enjoying writing "penis" so often in this post.  If I keep going, this post is going to turn into "penis penis penis penis PENIS!!!!!!" just because it's a fun word to say/write and it makes me giggle.

Yep, I'm a 30-year-old girl with the sense of humor/maturity level of a second-grader...

Were you hungry before? Well, you won't be once you read this...

Yeah, I know it's small, and I realize you might be squinting at it saying to yourself, "Does that really say poopers?"

I'm here to tell you that yes, it does indeed say poopers.  And these poopers are evidently called "jammers," and they're served with shrimp.

To be fair, while the error was on the online menu, it was not in the hard copy of the menu at the restaurant.  So at least they got something right, spelling-wise.

If there are any dieters reading this post, you can thank me now--I'm guessing pretty much anyone who's reading this post has now lost their appetite...

Hump Day Grammar: July 20, 2011

Kids, there's nothing funny about a penis being chopped off.  (The thought makes me cringe, and I don't even have a penis; I can't imagine how un-funny guys must think this sort of thing is.)  

But you know what's funny?  When Copyeditors Needed Now screws up a really simple headline (the word in question should be off, not of), and then the combination of this headline and the rest of the list of headlines is freakin' hilarious.  I guess comfort sex does not happen when one's penis is cut off...and when it comes to sex I suppose it's better to be either a switch or an iron than, say, a knife and/or a garbage disposal...

Happy Hump Day, everyone...don't let your Hump Day involve the cutting off of any valuable equipment, OK?

This is what happens when tipsy Yahoos don't proofread their stuff:

Hmmm...I bet research also showed that it's not a good idea to write articles after you've had that wine and that you should perhaps wait until you're sober so you don't screw up your words...  ;)

MISSPELLING MONDAY: July 11, 2011

Just in case you were wondering, it doesn't seem that access to dictionaries is one of the amenities they offer...

Thanks to JOHN Z. for spotting this one!

Bangin' my head on a brick wall of bad signage...

Hmmm, looks like whoever wrote this sign forgot to add "NO SPELLING STUFF CORRECTLY" and "NO PHRASING THINGS UN-AWKWARDLY."  Those are two rules we can pretty much guarantee are being followed around here...

Also, what the hell are "heelys"?  Are these actual things, and should I actually know what they are?  Enlighten me, please...

Thanks to JOHN B., who is super-awesome (and I swear I'm not just saying that because I'm dating him), for spotting this sign!

HUMP DAY GRAMMAR for July 6, 2011

Usually I see the opposite sort of error: somebody writes pubic instead of public, which makes me giggle my snarky little ass off.  Here someone actually meant to write pubic, and instead she wrote public.  The context of the sentence--"This is undermined by the fact that public hair (usually) isn't visible in the same way a mustache is"--makes it even more hilarious, since she wrote public instead of pubic when trying to articulate that pubic hair is generally not made public.  *giggle*

On a related note, the new job I've taken is in public relations, and damned if I don't double- and triple-check any materials that include my name and title, lest I make a public/pubic error in a corporate environment, making both an ass and a hypocrite out of myself in the process.  ;)

Happy Hump Day, you wild and crazy kids!