Friday, December 11, 2009

LAZY-ASS FRIDAY for December 11, 2009

So I'm introducing a new feature here at Red Pen, Inc. called Lazy-Ass Friday. Really, no further explanation should be necessary. By the time Friday rolls around, I probably haven't slept more than, like, 15 hours all week, I've been pulled in a dozen different directions (by a dozen different writing projects, naturally), and I have little to no patience left because I've inevitably dealt with too much stupidity in the earlier portion of the week. So instead of posting pictures of bad grammar, I'll be posting links to other funny shit on the web that deals with--you guessed it--that combination of bad grammar and retardedness that we've come to love so much.

Today's Lazy-Ass Friday features hilarity found on two of my very favorite blogs--Passive Aggressive Notes and Regretsy. Regretsy, run by a fellow snarky bitch, Helen Killer, is a zillion different kinds of awesome. Regretsy features the best of the worst of the Etsy world (Etsy = crafty, handmade stuff). Kids, the shit Helen Killer finds is truly...remarkable. And astounding. Often frightening. And always hilarious. Regresty's slogan--"Handmade? It looks like you made it with your feet."--is so dead-on.

So from Regretsy, we have this seriously creepy bear/girl painting. If there was ever a bear who was some sort of child molester, this is that bear. But where's the error, you ask? Read the Etsy seller's blurb underneath the creepy-ass painting, where it talks about how "This lucky girl has a best fiend for life." Hahaha...fiend! Spell-check is not your friend, pedophile bear enthusiast...you've gotta actually proofread this stuff...

And I have two giggleworthy Passive Aggressive Notes posts to share with you. First up, a note written by someone who I truly hope does not speak English as his or her first language. Gems from this note: "I would appreciate if you could please make your kids or the noise from the apartment less appears" (um, what?) and "Below you can see the hours of disturb" (and again with the um, what?). If this was written by a native English speaker...for shame!

And also from PAN, a note containing a very amusing phrase. I am sure this idiot meant to say "scapegoat," but instead he said "escape goat." This brings to mind some very hilarious mental pictures. Like of a goat in a lifeboat. Or a goat with a parachute on, jumping out of an airplane. Or the best mental picture I've come up with yet: the goat running so hard and so fast while escaping that it manages to trample the idiot who wrote the note... (Thanks to JUSTIN for sending this link my way!)

OK, that's all the Lazy-Ass Friday you guys get for today...'cause I'm lazy, naturally. ;) Have fabulous weekends, everyone! (On a related note--anyone else gonna be watching the Dexter season finale on Sunday night? I already can't wait!)

2 comments:

Bridgete said...

I used to love PAN...but I got tired of the comments. A lot of them were more passive-aggressive than what was in the post.

That being said...I like Lazy-Ass Friday! =)

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

I kinda like the PAN comments. Some of them can be funny. But you're right--many can be really annoying...