Wednesday, July 8, 2009

HUMP DAY GRAMMAR for July 8, 2009


So after last week's Hump Day Grammar post, MAMA GRAMMARPHILE had a special request. She'd noticed that a lot of recent Hump Day Grammar posts were about anal sex. (Which wasn't on purpose, of course--it just kinda happened that way.) So her request was that for the next Hump Day Grammar post--which is today's post--the topic wouldn't be anal sex. Done! (See what a good daughter I am? Mom, aren't you proud? LOL.)

So today we're gonna talk about what happens when you cross an erection with a secretion. You get...drum roll, please...a "secrection"!

But even funnier than a "secrection" is the second half of this Yahoo's question, dealing with becoming "dead afterward." It looks like--from the brief explanation below the question--that she's referring to her husband going limp, but from the "become dead afterward" phrasing, it really sounds like she's banging a vampire who, like, bangs her and then crawls in his little hole to be dead for a while before waking up again at nightfall. (And after reading that sentence, you're thinking, "Has somebody been watching too much True Blood lately?", and I admit--guilty as charged.)

Happy Hump Day, everyone!

15 comments:

mama grammarphile said...

If you think about it, *secrection* could be a rather precise definition of the secretion as a result of an erection. I say we campaign to add it to our lexicon. Following that line of thought, becoming dead afterward could be defined as a *sexecution*.

Love you.

Bridgete said...

Haha. Well not only have I been watching the new season of True Blood, but I also started reading the books it's based on. So, I'm right there with you on the whole vampire thing. ;)

Yvie said...

The question makes "secrection" sound like a small animal. It comes out and looks around, then promptly dies. I assume it looks something like a mole or shrew.

On a totally un-related grammatical note my boss seems to think that the plural of 'feedback' is 'feedbacks'. Every time I get an email asking for 'feedbacks' on something I get a little closer to flipping out.

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

@ Mama Grammarphile: LOL! Yes, that makes sense. Also, when I saw the word "sexecution," it immediately brought to mind what a female praying mantis does to a male praying mantis. (Love you too, and I hope you appreciated today's non-anal post!) :)

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

@ Bridgete: I read all the books, then bought/watched Season 1 on DVD, and am now enjoying Season 2. :) I'm glad I'm not the only fangbanger around here, haha! Are you Team Bill, Team Eric, or Team Sam?

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

@ Yvie: LOLOLOLOL!!! Well, now I know I'll never look at a shrewlike creature the same way again, haha.

"Feedbacks" is awful. Ugh. Do you get to give your boss performance reviews at all? 'Cause if you do, that's totally something to bring up then...

Yvie said...

Man, it's really best that we DON'T get to give him performance reviews. "Feedbacks" would only be the beginning of a very long list of daily grammatical errors. Ex:

"How does our product address’s and help fulfill their customer’s needs"

Seriously?

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

@ Yvie: Wow, so NOW I know what Dubya's been doing since he's been out of office. He's been hired as your boss! :) LOL.

LadyStyx said...

Damn. Sounds like girlfriend married my ex. I feel sorry for her....sort of.

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

LOL! Well, in that case, it's good you're rid of him! :)

G.H. said...

You're freaking hilarious.
Would you like to exchange links?


GH

http://confessions-of-a-waitress.blogspot.com/

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

Thanks, GH! So are you! :) And yes, I'd love to exchange links--I just added you to the "favorite cohorts" section of my sidebar!

Bridgete said...

Currently I'm Team Bill but I haven't quite finished the first book so I don't know if there's anything that will change my mind. But I do know that although Sam is adorable, I suspect it'll be similar to the whole Team Edward/Team Jacob thing. I'm more likely to be on a vampire's team...lol. I blame Buffy. Well, I blame the series, as characters go I blame Angel and Spike. ;)

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

I'm on Team Bill too, but I like Eric better than Bill out of the vampires. :) But yeah, no matter what, I'd pick a vampire over Sam, too. Even if he is kinda cute.

I've actually never seen an episode of Buffy. I don't know how I missed getting into that show...

Bridgete said...

*gasp* How could you have missed Buffy? Get Netflix (if you don't have it already) and start renting! If you like Eric, you'll LOVE Spike!