Wednesday, June 10, 2009

HUMP DAY GRAMMAR for June 10, 2009

Okay, you guys are gonna get a LOT of Hump Day action today here at Red Pen, Inc. I'm sure you like the sound of that, right?

First up--a picture from LadyStyx. She found it on FAILblog. Behold:



Oh, Mickey, you're so fine, you're so fine you blow my... *giggle*


This one was sent to me this morning via e-mail. And not by any of you awesomely snarky readers, either. Unbelievably enough, this was sent to me in seriousness--not in jest.


This picture raises lots of interesting issues. First: I'm a female, I can't have a boner, so why the hell was this sent to me? (Silly spammers. I guess they don't know or care that Ms. Grammarphile here is a GIRL.) Second: If I were a guy, and therefore capable of having a boner, I'm pretty sure that breaking walls with it would not be particularly high on my List of Things I'd Like to Do If I Had a Boner. Finally: "Dimplephrase"? Really? That's the website at which you're selling some sort of crazy boner-related product? WTF?

And here's a link not to a spelling or grammar error, but to...rather questionable wording. Like very questionable. Was this written by Pedophiles 'R Us or something? Yikes. (Hat tip to the fine folks at Gawker for being the first ones I've seen to point out this crazy phrasing.)

Happy Hump Day, you crazy kids! :)

10 comments:

Bridgete said...

That first one is priceless...

Yvie said...

I received one of these once where the tag-line was something about 'getting so big you'll tear her'. ... Not really a selling point, if you ask me.

Having said that, you KNOW there is at least one dude out there who would thrill at the idea of being able to 'brake' a wall with his junk. He is probably currently stuck in a vacuum attachment.

Dave said...

I think I have noticed a connection between the two images. In order to break walls with your boner, you'll need to invest in the Hyundai brand penis pump, which increases the size of your chram by 40 inches while producing a 72 hour-long hard on. This device can only be purchased at Disneyland on the outskirts of Pleasure Island, from a Ogre named Shrek.

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

@ Bridgete: I know! Hysterical. :)

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

@ Yvie: Hahaha! Re: "He is probably currently stuck in a vacuum attachment." ...Let's hope he causes enough damage to himself so that he cannot reproduce. ;)

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

@ Dave: LOLOLOLOL... Not surprised that this is sold on Pleasure Island, which was first dreamed up in the story of Pinocchio...and, of course, Pinocchio happens to be a character who had an appendage that grows quite long in certain situations...

LadyStyx said...

LOL@ Dave!

Now that last one...awesome! You catch the name of the ship? The Temptress. So I guess they just target male children?

That second one...*shakes head*...means I'll have to actually read those junk mails regarding how to increase the size of my appendage.....~evil grinz~ Considering the number of those I get and the "Im from the Ivory Coast" ones I receive, Im sure I could keep you busy for a while...

Sasha said...

"Cruising for kids" with open bar! Wow, I guess you do not have to go to Thailand for that anymore!

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

@ LadyStyx: I didn't notice that its name was "The Temptress"! LOL! That's hilarious.

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

@ Sasha: Apparently now you can even find that sort of behavior in the good ol' US of A! Crazy.