Monday, March 2, 2009

MAD LIBS WITH THE GRAMMARPHILE, March 2, 2009

There's a pattern here--every time there's crappy weather, I snag a lot of mistakes off weather websites just out of spite. I know they're not the ones causing the snow, but whatever. I don't want to shoot the messenger; I just want to red pen him.

First, though, I want to give this weather website some kudos because...well, I'd never have expected that they could have used a semicolon properly, and in the top paragraph, they totally did. So *yay* for them!

But they're back to their old tricks in the second paragraph. What's the severe thing that will be headed toward the southeast? I suspect they meant to say "storms", but they didn't say that, now did they? So I think it's up to you to decide, dear readers.

A strong storm, diving into the Southeast, will produce heavy rain and severe _____, followed by snow and wind.

Head to the comments section and fill in the blank... And if you're dealing with snowy weather today, be careful if you're on the roads!

19 comments:

Carlos said...

A strong storm, diving into the Southeast, will produce heavy rain and severe puddles, followed by snow and wind.

Yeah...I know...Pretty lame ;-)

One more thing about the weather story that bugs me: their use of "impact" as a verb. It's just one of my peeves.

mama grammarphile said...

How about "distress"?
Love you. Be safe. ;)

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

Carlos, I hate it when people use "impact" as a verb, too. I've been wondering a lot lately if that's a "bad/wrong grammar" thing that has actually become acceptable...I hear it all the freakin' time...

And re: puddles...ha! I wish it was only PUDDLES outside today! :)

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

"Distress" is probably pretty accurate, Mom. :) You guys stay safe...love you, too!

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

I'm gonna fill in the blank with "cupcakes." Because I'm just sick of storms producing all this crappy stuff. If you're gonna give us severe amounts of anything, Mr. Big, Bad Winter Storm, why not give us something fabulous like cupcakes?

Robin said...

A strong storm, diving into the Southeast, will produce heavy rain and severe depletion of grocery store stocks, followed by snow and wind.

At least, that's what happens around here. Whenever the meteorologists predict any kind of storm, people rush out to the store and buy enough milk and bread to last for weeks. As if the streets are going to become impassable or something. I have to wonder what they're going to do with it. Maybe buy a bunch of eggs too, and make oodles of french toast?

Hmm... french toast. It might be breakfast-for-dinner day... :D

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

Good answer, Robin--and it's SO true! :)

Now I'm getting hungry for French toast...and I have no eggs in the house...no bread, either! I'm the suckiest snowstorm shopper EVER, apparently.

Bridgete said...

A strong storm, diving into the Southeast, will produce heavy rain and severe cats, followed by snow and wind.

That's the only thing I could think of since I just got home yesterday (yay, just in time for the blizzard) and my cat is crawling all over me. But I suppose heavy rain would produce some severe cats...if they were caught outside. ;)

I also have an issue with "a developing big storm." It doesn't read well.

jblue said...

A strong storm, diving into the Southeast, will produce heavy rain and severe tongue-lashings, followed by snow and wind.

I'm happy I'm in sunny and scolding-free British Columbia. French toast would be so great right now.

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

@ Bridgete: Meow! :)

Yeah--I, too, dislike that "developing big storm" line (although I didn't catch how bad that read until the post was already posted!).

I hope you got less snow than I did here in NY...yuck, yuck, YUCK.

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

@ jblue: Oh, if only we could give the snow itself, or perhaps the weatherpeople, some tongue lashings... :)

I'm jealous of your sunshine!

random acts of HUH??? said...

how about "lapses in proper grammar"?

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

Ooh! That, too, is very accurate! ;)

LadyStyx said...

A strong storm, diving into the Southeast, will produce heavy rain and severe gas, followed by snow and (ill)wind(s).

Sorry...we had veggie and barley soup last night that was heavy on the beans. Wonderful food (as well as chili) for cold weather, but NOT so good for the olfactory glands.

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

Haha! Good one, LadyStux! (By the way, your soup sounds mm-mm-good!!!)

Borat Sagdiyev said...

A strong storm, divings into the Southeast, will produce a heavy rain and severe liquid explosions, followed by snow and winds. Great Success!

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

Liquid explosions! Good one, Borat!

ChicagoLady said...

A strong storm, diving into the Southeast, will produce heavy rain and severe flooding, followed by snow and wind.

I would think, with the drought in the southeast, that heavy rain would cause some flash floods.

P.S. LadyStux?

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

Geez. I'm shocked that you and LadyStyx (that's Styx with a "y"!) don't think I'm retarded by now!

Very logical thoughts on the heavy rain causing flash floods! YOU should work for this weather website. You are much smarter than the people they hire there!