Wednesday, September 24, 2008

The only real "dud" here is the idiot who made this sign...


I saw this sign outside a racy lingerie store the other day as I was eyeing up some of the interesting outfits in the window. See, I kind of have a fascination with cute underwear, and anything else that might pass for underwear, such as the cute little barely-there lace dress thing that was displayed in the store window. I was half-tempted to go in there and buy something raunchy--something ridiculously tight, maybe sequined or feathered or faux-leather--and take it to the store next door, which happened to be one of those Jesus-type stores, and wave my purchase around in there just to shock the employees, all the while talking about how every night I pray to the god of lingerie that I will always have oodles of cute underwear and that I will never, ever, ever get even a bit of cellulite on my thighs...but I didn't. But I was tempted. (This little agnostic girl here has a completely warped sense of humor, especially when it comes to raunchy underwear shops and Jesus shops existing right next door to one another. That's just asking for mischief from underwear-loving heathens like me.)

But I digress. After I stopped eyeing up the stuff in the window, I noticed this sign. Apparently whoever made the sign doesn't know that DVD needs to be completely capitalized (not just the first D, silly goose!) and doesn't understand proper apostrophe usage. Yikes! I find it amusing that in the particular font that's used on the sign, it looks like the store sells "Fitness Duds." (Okay, I guess it would really be "Fitness Dud's," if we're going for accuracy here, but it hurts my hands and my head to type that mistake out.)

Plus, I love how this store also sells stripper poles. Hey, if I'm ever lacking for writing inspiration, I may have to go back there and get one of those--if it worked for Diablo Cody (who wrote the super-witty novel Candy Girl, but most folks know her as the mastermind behind the movie Juno), it could work for this budding author here too, right?

3 comments:

mandyannemurray said...

Can I just say: HA!

I've always wanted to go into a Geebus store with my live-in boyfriend and talk real loudly about how we're living in sin.

But then I think I'd probably be smitten the moment I walked out the door.

(P.S. I had no idea smitten was the proper form of smite in that usage.)

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

Hahaha! Mandy, we're kindred spirits. :) (Also, until this very moment, I didn't know "smitten" was the right form of "smite" in this instance, either. I love learning new word-related stuff!)

Becky said...

Sexy exercise wear?? There is nothing I could wear to make me look sexy on the treadmill.