Saturday, May 3, 2008

No, you're not seeing things. Yes, the Grammarphile just made a bunch of spelling errors.

Okay, I've admittedly phound a totally lame bunch of punctuation and spacing screw-ups (above) just to have an excuse to talk about my super-phabulous phightin' Phillies, who are now, phor the third night in a row, in phirst place in the NL East. And in honor of this momentous occasion (hey, last year the Phillies weren't in phirst place by themselves until September 27, and that sure as hell wasn't phor three straight days!), I'm spelling every word that begins with an f-type sound with a ph instead. Last April/May, the Phillies phinished at the bottom of the NL East. One year later (even with Rollins still on the DL, Howard slumping, and Victorino just getting back phrom being injured), they're kickin' ass and taking names. They're only a halph-game ahead of Phlorida and the phuckin' Mets, but still--they're ahead. A lot of that's due to Chase Utley and Pat Burrell having amazingly hot bats (and this time I mean that in the actual batting sense, pholks, not in the "he's so hot" sense, even though they are both attractive), so kudos to them phor keeping the Phillies aphloat.

In conclusion: phuck you, Mets; go get 'em, phightin' Phillies; and I have seriously got to quit it with this ph shit because I'm actually getting a headache phrom (one last time! Couldn't help it!) reading it all!


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