Wednesday, May 28, 2008

The Grammarphile kinda has a potty mouth sometimes...


I'm so freakin' pissed off at the seriously crappy way this writer forgot to use a few very necessary hyphens. I know that this shit-for-brains writer knows how to properly use hyphens, since he does so just fine in number one and number two (paragraphs, that is...tee-hee!), so it's kind of a mystery why he just stopped using them in the middle of paragraph three. He should have written liquid waste-gathering and solid waste-collecting, of course, but apparently his knowledge of punctuation rules totally went down the toilet. (Not the toilet at the space station, obviously...since we now know that it's not exactly working properly. In all seriousness, that's a real pisser for those poor astronauts.)

Okay, I think that's enough sophomoric excrement-related humor for one post. Plus, I know that my poor mother is reading this, shaking her head, wondering where she went wrong and asking herself why she wasn't lucky enough to have a normal child (it should be obvious by reading some of my posts exactly why I'm an only child, right?). Sorry, Mama Grammarphile. No matter how old I get, I can't resist making a bunch of retarded jokes about feces and urine!

8 comments:

Joe said...

I'm not an expert with my own blog about grammar, so I may very well be wrong, but my first instinct is to place the hyphens differently. To me, "liquid waste-gathering part" implies that the part is liquid, even without a comma between the modifiers. I would have written either "liquid-waste gathering part" or "liquid-waste-gathering part." But again, I would do so just because it feels right, not because I know the rules from a certain style guide.

mama grammarphile said...

Love you, Sweetie.

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

Love you too, Mom! :)

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

Hi, Joe! I hyphenate in certain ways because it "feels right," too (damned if I can clearly explain *why* it's right--generally I just know that it *is* right). Here's why I decided on how I hyphenated these, though. The words "liquid" and "solid" modify the two instances of the word "waste." The part in question gathers the waste no matter which word "waste" is modified by. And while I know I'm not explaining this coherently at all, this is why I feel like something like "liquid waste" does NOT need to be hyphenated, but "waste-gathering" does, therefore making the correct phrase "liquid waste-gathering."

Did I just spend that long discussing the hyphenization possibilities for excrement-related phrases AGAIN? Wow, haha. :)

Beth said...

I really want to do a study on people who make fun of bad grammar and also love making a ridiculous number of dirty jokes. Obviously there's a correlation here, based on my observations of myself. And now you.

:)

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

Hi, Beth! I was thrilled to see some new posts from you the other day when I stopped by your page. I'm glad you're doing better! :) ...Haha, at least with people like us, our dirty jokes are properly written, with accurate grammar and spelling, right? But yes, you're right, that would be an interesting study!

Becky said...

Eeeeeeeeeeew.

THE GRAMMARPHILE said...

Eeeeeew is right, Becky--regarding the lack of working toilet, the crappy punctuation mistakes, and a few of my really bad puns in that entry! :) Hehehe.